The decade in movies was dominated by magical dinosaurs, pretty boy Leonardo DiCaprio being killed by a magical iceberg, aliens attacking in Independence Day and Adam Sandler rising to fame "pretending" to be an idiot.
The English language was taken hostage by four fingered yellow cartoon characters who say such quotables as "Doh" , "Funny because it's true" and "My Eyes! The Goggels do nothing!".
The decade in fashion was shaped by a dead "grungie" named Kurt someone or other, Pete the one armed sailor pioneering the hot new "one armed" look in smart casual fashion, and of course the colour black, followed by the new "black", black. Haircuts varied.
Politically, Reaganism was replaced by Clintonism, which is very close to Hugh Heffner-ism. Boris Yeltsin pioneered Vodka-ism and Funny Dance-ism. In Australia, Johnny Howard pioneered big-tax-ism and Paul Keating pioneered not-my-pig-farm-ism. The French blew stuff up with harmless Nuclear weapons.
In terms of technology, the personal computer hit new heights thanks to the internet explosion, and due to the fact he has a monopoly, Bill Gates managed to buy everything that Ted Turner and Rupert Murdoch didnŐt want (ala trampoline room). CD's firmly buried vinyl records, which it has been scientifically proven, "sounded crap". As we speak, the VHS sales are being slowly eroded by DVD, a digital video disc system formed through an exclusive joint venture between Hitler and the Devil. In a related story, hell froze over when the surviving Beatles got back together in 1995 to release 3 new albums to raise money for their favourite charity: themselves.
In Sports news: people kept playing sport.
The following people died: Princess Diana, Frank Sinatra, Nicole Simpson, Adolf Hitler, Yitzak Rabine, Kurt Cobain, a couple of Kennedys, Sonny Bono, Andrew Olle, Stanley Kubrick, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman, Richard Nixon, four dumb snowboarders and Elvis Presley.
And now, the poem of the century:
There once was a sportsman from Wagga Wagga
who wouldn't eat his weigh and curds
so up came a man from Nantuckett
and everywhere that the sportsmen went
the sheep was sure say hello
This sportsmen had a brother from Wagga Wagga
everyone hated him because he had no earholes
Yes, it's been quite a decade, some would say, the best decade since the 1980's, but whoever says that is two-faced liar.
This issue was not proofreadzzqxz.
So, as we approach the end of the year, it has become a yearly ritual for Dr Cue and I (Dylab) to write The Year in Review, this being the second year of this long and ceremonial tradition.
Things happened this year:
Kosovo, Chechnya, Kashmir and Australia invaded East Timor.
The Turkish, Grecian and Taiwanese Earthquakes.
Star Wars flopped while Jar Jar Binks induced vomiting in and around cinema complexes, while the Austin Powers catchphrase "Yeah Baby" had similar effects when overused by unattractive people.
ItŐs the last year people can say "Hey man, it's the nineties!".
Gun-Crazed Americans went crazy in Littleton, Colorado and a several other places. But seriously, everyone in America has the right to bare arms and to shoot everyone else as well. In reaction to the Colorado shooting, Charlton Heston, President of the National Rifle association said "Guns is Gooda".
Boris Yeltsin got drunk and fired his cabinet a few times. Then he did a funny dance.
Auteur film director Stanley Kubrick died. John Laws had no comment because he had not been paid to speak out on the topic. In a press release he did say "Banks are good, banks are fine, banks are fantastic".
The GST (the "go and get stuffed tax") was passed (barely) and all of us people who buy NEW cars can look forward to a slight price cut.
Male supermodel Fabio was hit in the head by a flying goose on the maiden voyage of an American rollercoaster. Unfortunately the wrong goose was killed in the incident, as Fabio was relatively uninjured.
Best of luck to everyone graduating, See ya, Dr Cue & Dylab.
Originally intended to be published in Curio #13, October 1999 at the University of Canberra. But it wasn't.